Egg-cellent Retrieval

After being put on the short protocol of IVF/ICSI, daily injections, and daily scans it was time for our egg retrieval. I got up extra early, showered but avoided perfumes as instructed by the nurse. Shaved my lady area so it was semi presentable, and tried to do a nervous poo. Exactly 36 hours after our trigger shot, we were at the hospital at 6.30 am. I waited as Sam parked the car, still feeling not with from lack of sleep and the cocktail of HCG, Fyrmedal and Menopur swimming through my body. The whole experience was a blur.

MTV Cribs:
Shortly after filling out the correct forms, a nice man appeared to show us to our room. We had a whole fricking room! This was luxury as someone who has had their share of NHS operations. Normally all you get is a shoddy curtain between you. It suddenly became an episode of cribs, I bounced around showing off the assets. Here we had a TV, a wardrobe, a bed and one of those cool slidey tables so you literally don't have to move. There was a seat with a foot stool and a complimentary paper. Of course, like any good luxury establishment we had an en suite with shower and tiny soaps. I was so impressed by the room, I almost forgot why I was there.

What What in my butt?
The doctor came to see me beforehand, and advised I empty my bladder. Then a series of nurses came in to go through paper work and drill you on the procedure. I was ready because our Dr had already drilled me. "What are you here for?" He asked, "Egg retrieval." I responded. He went through them all, ensuring that I got them right. So when the nurses came, I was ready. Apart from when they told me I'd have to have pain relief up my ass. That threw me, shove a wanda with two pronged suction needles through my actual vagina. I had gotten my head around that, but someone along with a lot of people were going to be staring at my arsehole, while inserting pain relief. Could infertility get any more glamorous?


My husband laughed when they left, he saw my reaction. All I could think of after was that weird what what in the butt song that was going around years ago. I laughed with my husband, "do you think they'll be playing what what in the butt as they do it?" I said "All you have to do is have a wank!" Of course I know it wasn't that simple, he had a lot of pressure but the unfairness of it all! Then they came to take me to the ward, and suddenly I needed a wee. How annoying for them. I told them how I vomit after general anaesthesia and have passed out, they ensured me that I'd have extra sickness meds.

Final Countdown:
I went in to theatre, and there's a shit ton of people there. I was amazed with how many people were there. It made me a little scared, people were talking but I wasn't listening. Also is it just me or are all anaesthetist's a little quirky? Mine was cracking jokes setting things up. People were sticking things on me, triple checking I knew what I was having.  Then my doctor came, he gave me some reassuring words and held my hand. I went under, and it was all done.

I woke up my pain meds hadn't kicked in, I could feel it in my bum. I had strong period like pains, and heard the nurse say " Twelve eggs." I asked, "They got 12 eggs?" Relief set in, they were surprised to see me awake but they confirmed. Later it was confirmed we actually got 14 eggs. One thing I didn't know is, not every follicle has an egg. So you may have loads of follicles but not as many eggs.

Wheeled back into the room, I was still slightly in fairyland off my bum drugs. The doctor came into the room, with a huge box of hens eggs. "Here are your eggs I've collected." He said smiling proudly, he reminded me so much of my own Dad. My Dad is a retired doctor, and makes jokes all the time. I could imagine him doing this. I laughed and he explained we had 12 eggs, the procedure went well and I was to rest and recover.

ICSI:
No need for the sperm to seduce the egg in a mating dance, ICSI was like a top quality dating site. They'd look at the qualities of Sam's sperm, and match them to the qualities of my eggs. They'd then inject the sperm straight into the egg and hope for the best. We would then be called the following few days to see which, if any, had fertilised.

The Debrief:
After everything was done and I had eaten and passed urine, it was off back to the fertility office. They explained that they would call and let us know how things were going, then introduced us to the progesterone pessaries I would take twice a day. Little did I know, those little waxy bullets in my cupboard would become something I hated doing. Twice a day once in the morning once at night, you lay there with one melting in you.That's more thinking time than I'd like! We would then be told when transfer was on one of those calls.

The egg retrieval had gone really well, we were really happy. On that news, off we went home to start popping the progesterone and have a mega nap. Sam had the week off with me which was nice. It's important to take it easy and have time together. This journey is crazy emotional!

All my love,
Blue moon girl xx