Bluemoonbaby

I like to think in this photograph of the SATC girls Miranda is saying something to the crew like "So then the bitch told me to relax and I'd get pregnant." Samantha's like, "WTF dude that's not an OK thing to say." Carrie's laughing 'cause can't relate she's a single pringle who cba with the kids thing. Charlotte's smiling sweetly thinking "Oh honey, it's only going to get worse from here..." I'm damn Charlotte at this moment in my life, smiling at my friends and people I meet. Not wanting to tell them too much about all the hurtful and annoying comments people will be making about their journey. Or the fact you have to share such intimate details of your life that you would never share with anyone. Welcome darlings to the world of infertility, a club that no one really wants to be part of.  I'm going to try and prepare you somewhat, using real life things people have said to me. I'll also t...

My actual face So today was our official meeting with out IVF consultant, however she wasn't there so we saw another doctor. We arrived half an hour early, and our appointment was pushed back when we arrived by an hour. It's an odd feeling sitting in the waiting room with a mixture of people there, some waiting for blood tests others obviously waiting for the same thing we were. Waiting Game: I sat next to my husband, looking across the sea of anxious couples holding hands and kissing foreheads. I saw nothing but hope, strength and love. It was overwhelming at times, this process seems so negative, but look at the love. I wanted to stand up and go "Hey guys you all going through infertility too? Shall we sit in a circle and talk about our feelings?" However I think that would have been frowned upon. So I sat quietly twirling my hair, something I do when I'm nervous, and holding my husband's hand. He was so nervous too, but smiled and reassured me i...

Today I took the leap and asked for something I have been wanting to ask for a long time for myself. I have struggled dealing with the chronic fatigue that endometriosis and PCOS can bring. My body has been feeling weaker, I have been ill for longer and get ill very quickly. My body is in constant fight or flight mode, which makes healing difficult. Team that with a lack of adequate rest, and it's a recipe for disaster! Especially when you know you're going to be putting yourself through the most physically and mentally draining time of your life. I asked my boss about going part time, and she was incredibly supportive. So much so it made my cry, surprise surprise as I'm an emotional wreck atm. I have my formal meet  tomorrow to see what's next, and of course my next IVF appointment to meet my doctor on Friday.  I feel for me personally, going through work full time would not put me physically and mentally where I need to be. I get I am very lucky to be able to do thi...

And as I sat here typing on my laptop, I thought for a moment...Could I give other ladies tips and tricks for dealing with trying for a baby? And that answer is, I can try. Hello my ttcers! I've had a few people both online and in real life ask for some advice for trying for a baby. How I laughed and laughed, as I am yet to actually successfully become with child. However, I do have pretty much a bachelors degree in trying. So here is some of my advice for when you're trying for a baby: Take  400 micrograms of folic acid BEFORE you get preggers. Folic acid is essential in aiding a healthy pregnancy and healthy development of your baby. I use Ante natal forte from the natural dispensary , this was recommended to me by my nutritionist. I started taking mine as soon as we started trying, but you can take it for however long beforehand. Get a fertility check up with your doctor. Go with your partner and let them know you are trying, they'll give you some proper med...

Image from Mosie Baby website On the sixth month of ttc desperation I started to look for anything to make the journey shorter. I researched my ass off and found some people use at home self insemination kits. They simply use their devices to swoop up the sperm and place it where it needs to be. Simple! Plus if I'm honest, the very frequent sex was beginning to get a bit boring. The fun and spontaneity had truly gone, it was a chore at times. A self insemination kit seemed like the easy solution for getting our sanity and sex life back while also still trying for a baby. So I did what any millennial does best, I googled the shit out of it. I saw some people used turkey basters, despite having one in the kitchen draw I decided this wasn't for  me. The thought of shoving a kitchen utensil up myself just wasn't appealing. The whole self insemination thing was strange enough on it's own for me.  I then found that some people also thought the turkey baster w...

These past few weeks have been about celebrating turning 29 and getting back into the flow of working life. Something has shifted within me since my 29th birthday, and I'm not quite sure what it is. The week before my birthday I was filled with this immense feeling of happiness and gratitude for my life. I felt free, excited and happy where I am at. Children didn't effect me, going to a park didn't shift my mood. I hope it's here to stay. I keep having dreams about being pregnant lately or having a baby. The other day in my dream we had a one year old girl who was so adorable. I was carrying her around our home, which in my dream wasn't our home that we're in now, and just smiling. I asked my husband where we got her from, "Did we adopt her? Did I give birth to her?" I asked him, he was just as puzzled as I was. I took care of her, bathed her before bed time and carefully styled her black hair into ponytails. It was a surreal dream. Last night I dr...

As I sit here approaching my 29th year on this Earth I can't help but reflect on the time that has passed. Someone once told me your twenties are the years for making mistakes. I definitely took that on board, I made some really fun mistakes and learned from every single one. It's mad how much your twenties shape you and change your life. When I first turned 20 I got a real job working in childcare. I was a young 20, lived at home still and knew nothing about the real world. I hated my job, I left after six months and applied to university. When I turned 21 I moved up North to study Early Years, it was my first time living away from home. I learned so much about myself and grew as a person.  I thought I'd take some time to reflect on my twenties and my own personal journey through what have been the most incredible years of my life thus far. Over the years I have had many dates, had a few serious boyfriends and gotten engaged and married. Friends have come, gone out with ...